life stages – Page 2

August 19, 2011August 25, 2011

Family Fridays…Life Transitions or “Moving Our World”

Wednesday was move-in day at the local university, as well as the first day of class for the public schools.

Watching parents of college freshman sit in long lines of traffic to reach the dorms and overhearing parents of young children discuss taking their children to their first day of school were reminders of some of the transitions that families face during their lifecourse.

I often ponder the idea of transitions, or changes, required in our own individual, as well as our family’s, lifetime. Sometimes this involves an actual move from one location to another, though at other times it is a life change that moves our worlds–or life as we have known it. For example, going to college, getting married, starting a career, having a baby, children growing up and leaving home, or aging parents becoming ill. While some people change and adjust more easily, many seem to resist and have difficulty making the changes smoothly without first thinking, questioning, and finally resolving the challenges that are inherent even with changes we actually want!

According to Froma Walsh, flexibility and the ability to adapt are key factors in individual and family resilience. Resilience is the ability to meet challenges and stress in ways that not only allow us to cope but even gain something positive from the experience. Not that we tend to seek out these experiences but life just seems to naturally contain them!

So why the resistance? I believe it depends, at least in part, on the timing of the transitions. When we are rested, healthy, and ready to take on the world, it seems easier to be flexible and adapt. When we are in need of rest, recuperation, and renewal, the extra challenges require of us strengths we may feel we do not have at the moment.

While helping a friend move from their apartment, I was reminded of all of the times I have moved and how much energy it required to sort, pack, and change the organization of my daily life. Things I normally had in a specific place and knew automatically where they were was disrupted and everything took more time to accomplish. Things like, Where is the soap?, …the stamps to mail a letter?–or even, Where is the post office itself?! Of course, with time we learn these things, reorganize our living spaces, and return to some sense of normalcy… but good or bad, some things remain different and a transition has been made… our worlds have been moved.

*What have you found is helpful in making transitions?

Keys to Resilience: Transformation Through Adversity (www.winebago.uwex.edu)
Family Fridays – “Look For the Helpers” (jonibeach.com)
Empty Nest (psychologytoday.com)
How to Survive Back-to-School and Other Life Transitions-cnbnews.net (gloucestercitynews.net)

August 11, 2011August 19, 2011

Thursday In the Studio–The Final Stages…

Several years ago, I found the books of author Joan Anderson. She described her life transition as her sons graduated from high school, she faced an empty nest, and her husband announced a new move. Not wanting to relocate again, she took a year to stay alone at her family’s beach house on Cape Cod. During this time, she met ninety year old Joan Erikson, wife of psychoanalysis Erik Erikson, on a walk on the beach. Together they made weavings on hand looms, using colored yarn to represent each stage of life they had lived. (See Wisdom and the Senses by Joan Erikson.)

I have played with these ideas for several years while studying human development. In Lifeweaving #3 , my interest in art and life transitions are merged. The final strips–silver and gold–representing the 8th and 9th stages of life are finally woven.

My next step will be to layer the top with a batting and backing-basting the woven strips in place and quilting to add more texture to the design.

After designing and beginning this piece, I found an interesting book, Plaited Patchwork by Shari Cole, in our local library. Shari describes her method of weaving fabric to make quilts that was based on the Pacific Islanders’ plaiting techniques for making woven mats. Interestingly, her method is very similar to what I was already doing for Lifeweavings #3.

While weaving the fabric strips, I wrote in a journal as I focused on each stage of life–What were the strengths I gained at that time? What experiences contributed positively to my development and creativity? What artistic designs, motifs, and techniques have been gathered over the years? I will use these writings as part of a workshop and book on our life’s creative journey…

So as this part of my project is finished, the quilting will begin… I will keep you posted on my progress– that is…my lifeweaving!